10 things you never do whilst growing up in an Irish Household….

1. Boil the kettle with no water in it…We have all been lead to believe that this will cause the kettle to explode lol. Nobody has ever tried it so whether or not this is true remains to be seen but the fear alone of doing this is enough to always pick up the kettle and give it a shake before you boil it we don not want any explosions on our hands now or Mammy will kill us.

2. Never let the fire go out…. It is seen as a sign of laziness. “You couldn’t even keep the fire going”. It is almost seen as an act of pure selfishness. This might seem a little dramatic but it is true. You will never be able to own your own house or live alone if you can’t simply “throw a few briquettes or turf on the fire”

3. Make tea for yourself without offering the rest of the family tea. It may not be commented on and you may think you have gotten away with it but it is noted in your families mental notes. You will slowly but surely notice you are being excluded from the tea round. Unless it is your mother. Irish mothers always offer tea to their offspring no matter how many times they have been excluded.

4. Throw your dinner in the bin… Whether it be a lot or a little. There is bound to be some cat or dog out the back that would be glad of your leftovers. Whether it has fallen on the ground or didn’t taste right. It is just something you don’t do!.

5. Let the heat get out…. You walk into a room and don’t close the door behind you in the middle of winter. This kind of act can be punished with anything from a mouthful of abuse like “Jaysus were ya born in a feckin field ” to a slap on the side of the head , yup always close the feckin door after ya.

6. Leave the curtains pulled later than 9 o clock in the morning. “They’ll think we’re sleeping all day”. I was never quite sure who “they” were but to leave the curtains pulled late into the morning is a definite on this list. It is seen as another act of pure and utter laziness

7. Leave the immersion on. Holy Jaysus,Again, your parents see this as an act of pure laziness. Your parents will start to question you on where you think money comes from and informing you that money is not something that grows on trees.Do you think you live in a bloody hotel ? you will have to earn your keep if you keep this craic up.

8. Eat a sandwich without a bag of crisps. Whether you’re a Walkers , king or a Tayto kind of person. You could eat the most fulfilling sandwich ever created but it just doesn’t hit the spot quite like it would if you had a packet of cheese and onion to go along with it! Crisps are really a must with a good owl sambo.

9. Never question what your father is doing whether he is out in the shed in the garden , you will always get the answer leave him alone he is happy doing whatever he is doing don’t go annoying him

10. Change the channel when your mother is watching the soaps or change the channel when your Father is watching football is a major no no.” why cant you leave well enough alone” just leave well enough alone safer that way.




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